From Issue 107 — Bait and Switch
How do you write a book in 30 days? I don’t know. But I can tell you how to finish one in 16 years—with guilt as your unexpected writing partner.
I know, I know – I’m supposed to tell you how to do it in 30 days, or some nonsense like that. But what’s more useful? The impractical knowledge you know deep down doesn’t fit your reality, or the real world experience of a mom of two/business owner/writer who
cracked the code on how to return again and again?
All the typical writing advice, of course, applies: if you want to write… write! Apply tush to cush. Allow yourself a shitty first draft and then edit. Make sure you read it out loud.
But here’s the thing they don’t tell you: you have to make friends with guilt.
That’s right – friends. Guilt has got to be your ally, because nothing will kill a project – a hope, a dream – quicker than being swamped by guilt.
The swamping happens quickly. One day you’re going along and the words are flowing, your character’s glowing, and the world is good. The next, Life has happened and you realize you dropped the ball on that magical 30 day plan. Or maybe you have the kids home sick, or hit writer’s block, and suddenly the work-in-progress that was crystal clear yesterday is a muddy mess today, and you don’t know where to take it from here.
Guilt is inevitable.
What it can’t be is absolute. Guilt can’t be an insurmountable wall, the final stopping place. If you’re going to bring a book – or any long-term project – to fruition, you must learn to see guilt as the next step in the journey, not the ending point.
That means knowing your guilt and becoming intimate enough with it to know what it wants. And that means knowing that different types of guilt need different approaches.
There’s the guilt that whispers horrible things about what kind of a person you are, criticizing every misstep and mistake along the way. That kind of guilt thinks it’s being helpful and keeping you safe, but really it’s just being a bully. Bullies need strong boundaries.
There’s the guilt you feel when making a hard decision, deciding between two things you value. You know something has to give and one party is going to be disappointed; that’s a much different type of guilt, that needs a much different approach to release it.
In my own writing journey, learning the difference between those two types of guilt was the difference between stalling in my work and being able to return easily to my writing when Life quieted down.
Working with my guilt – not just once, but again and again – was vital to finishing, because when you conceive of a book at 14, start it at 35 and publish it at 51 you feel guilty a lot, but I overcame it, and you can too.
Just sidle up to your old friend guilt and see what they have to say. Get comfy and learn to collaborate.
Need help clearing away your guilt? I created the 60-second quiz to help you name and banish the guilt that’s keeping you from your dreams, and you can find it here. Want to see what a book that took 16 years to complete looks like? Buy your copy here.
Quiz link: https://www.deborahglobus.com/turning-guilt-into-gold
Book link: https://www.amazon.com/Gospel-According-Maggie-Deborah-Globus/dp/1646492943
